I would like to become a Monk. But I am married among other “set backs”?

by Joshua

(Dalian, Liaoning, China)

For most of my life I have been “Buddhist” per se, when it comes to my mindset. Despite being raised in an over zealous American Christian/Catholic family (excluding my mother). I believe morality, humanity, and the common good come from within ourselves not from external forces.

I’ve been married a few months now to my wife who is Japanese. However, recently we’ve been actively exploring Buddhism and it’s precepts. Lately, I’ve been telling my wife that I would like to become a Buddhist Monk. However, the only form of buddhism that I am Aware of that allows you to remain married and become a monk is Japanese Buddhism. Which works out really with my wife being Japanese. However, I am concerned this may not be the case because with anything you read online. There are yes and no answers to all questions. No direct or definitive answers.

We’re now living in China because I am teaching english to Children here and the only access to Temples I have here are Chinese. But, I am not willing to give up my marriage to become a monk.

Is there a way I can become a Monk and still keep my marriage?

*******Note from Hugo*******

As you mention, Japanese Buddhism allows monks ( i would call them priests more than monks but it is the proper term) to get married since the Meiji Restoration (1867.)

I hear that this practice influenced Korea and Taiwan. A nun in Taiwan gave birth in 2011. Some Korean monks live with wives in their monasteries.
Monks of some Chinese lay Buddhist sects may also marry, such as in historical Yunnan, Lingnan and Taiwan.

I don’t know about Dalian but there might be a Buddhist temple somewhere. Have your wife ask the Japanese consulate, they would know.

If not, study for a while and then move to Japan. You will have plenty of choices here.

There is also the possibility of being a layman for a Buddhist organisation.