by jamie

(georgia usa)

I feel like my mind is running at 1000mph. I’m 24 years old and I feel like I’m 60 trying to make up for or get to some point before I die…

Medical doctors would say it’s anxiety.
It’s bigger than that… I need to achieve some point in my life. I want to go somewhere but I have no clue where it is I want to get to…

A christian based person would see me as an easy mark, but it’s on such a more intelligent level than that.

I need to find clarity to get to this point. I need something to center myself and my energy so I can use it properly. Something to contain the madness in a pure solid methodical way.

Since I was little I knew I would be “above average” at something. I would have/do more than others… I have yet to figure out what it is but it’s still there… something inside me kept telling myself to find a way to organize the madness before it drives me crazy.

I think this is it… I have done some amateur like meditation and I have actually scared myself after being able to view the world around me in a weird “DUH!” kind of way… I need more of those awakening moments to keep me from running hot…

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Jun 22, 2011

Why cannot my mind be as serene as the water in the lake?

by: Bita Asakura

Hi Jamie,

It is so interesting I’ve also suffered from such a mind that does not quiet and is always turbulent.
If you read the book You Were Born for a Reason
, you will soon find out that Shinran, the founder of true Pure Land sect also was bothered by the movements of his mind (Read page 60: Try as I will to quiet the waters of my heart, the waves of thought continually move; try as I will to achieve a mind bright as the full moon, clouds of delusion blanket it. How can I indulge myself in trivial socializing and wear myself out with useless studies?…)
You will definitely find your answer in true Pure Land Buddhism. Read the book and let us discuss some more!
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